The Tail of Two Trails

It was the best of trails, it was the worst of trails.

It was the Umpqua River Trail. Ok, it was really only one trail, but it it did have a split personality: always beautiful, always dangerous; always fun, always miserable.

Originally, as anyone who knows me will attest, I had planned on riding all 70 miles of single track (the top 9 being wilderness).

There was quite a bit of information about the trail online and I did a lot of studying up on it. However, there were no hard numbers for total assent going from top to bottom. I knew that I’d start at roughly 4500 and drop down to 700. Seems like a good downhill coast, no?

No. Not so much.

Prep rides included beasts like my attempt on Strawberry with 4500 ft of elevation gain. I felt like I was in pretty good working order until, while in Oregon, I purchased a topo designed specifically with mountain bikers in mind.

It reported—from top to bottom an elevation gain of 13,000 ft.

My little unprepared brain eked out a, “Good gravy. If that’s accurate, you’re toast.” Before seizing up.

So much for coasting down some wicked singletrack.

But I’d come all this way—of course I’d still make the attempt. I prepped my gear, did some last minute repairs including rebuilding my front hub, and tried to get some sleep.

I’d struggled all week long with a wicked sore throat. It was so bad that I could hardly eat and it woke me at night. Natually I was worried about it hindering my ride. (It didn’t. It was a tender mercy that the entire ride was (throat) pain-free. It came back with a vengeance that night.)

I woke at 4:30 am and started getting ready. Caren—who was acting as my shuttle driver—also got up and got the baby fed and we piled into the van. We left a about 30 minutes later than planned and by the time we arrived I was an hour behind my start time. Not good.

During the planning stages, I’d built in a cut-off time for the lowest segment—Tioga—a 15 mile isolated stretch that climbed about 3500 feet and descended 3600 feet. If I was able to get to the trailhead by 4 pm, I’d be able to finish it before dark. Anything after 4 and I’d have to call it quits.

Caren planned on meeting me about midway for lunch. I’d stashed an extra water bladder behind some logs in case we couldn’t connect. In theory Caren would be able to know exactly where I was thanks to my SPOT device. But because we didn’t know whether or not she’d have cell coverage or not we decided to do a manual workaround: tie strips of fabric to trailhead signs. That worked well since my stupid SPOT didn’t send more than 3 updates—none of which she would have gotten anyway.

Lemolo segment
Difficulty: Advanced
Gain: 734
Loss: 781
Length: 5.6 miles
Lemolo was my fastest and, in many ways, my favorite segment. I was fresh and there was little climbing. Additionally, as it turned out, I didn’t need all of my cold-weather gear. I did use my lobster gloves and my Under Amour top, but other than that, I was okay. It started out a little above 37° and only toped out at 70°.

I really can’t say enough about the quality of the Umpqua River Trail. It was clearly marked and well brushed. The times where the trail builders could have gotten lazy, they didn’t. In fact, during Lemolo the trail parallels a dirt road for several miles but only comes down to cross it. It’s nice to be 100-150 yards from the road and know that some trail planner didn’t get lazy and say, “Well, the road is right there, let’s just use it for the next couple of miles.”

Dread and Terror segment
Difficulty: Expert
Gain: 2282
Loss: 3867
Length: 12.7 miles
With a name like Dread and Terror, you’d think I would have approached this section with a little more humility. I knew it was the only section rated “expert.” I knew that I’d deal with a fair amount of exposure. I also knew that I’d be on a fairly technical trail for almost 13 miles. But I was on my second segment and ready to go—no need for caution here!

Let’s just say this: Dread and Terror lived up to it’s name. I was on an exposed section of the trail more than 70% of the time. Sometimes the drop-off was sloped (45° or more) and sometimes it was a sheer drop. Sometimes that drop was a dozen feet, sometimes 60 or 90 feet. The end result of a tumble would have been, more often than not, a dunk in a freezing and wild river.

Hello hypothermia.

But the same advice I gave my kids when riding applied here: Look where you want to go. Don’t look where you don’t want to go. The few times that I chanced a look down a drop off were the very times I came close to dropping a wheel over the edge. Those instances shocked me with adrenaline and helped me remember that a fall here could be, at best, a trip to the hospital and at worst a trip to the morgue.

But for all the exposure, Dread and Terror was by far the most beautiful segments I passed through. Stunningly green doesn’t even come close to describing it. Verdant, eye-poppingly green.

Hot Springs segment
Difficulty: Advanced
Gain: 1047
Loss: 824
Length: 3.6 miles

A “Caution: NUDITY” sign was the first thing to be seen on the trailhead to Hot Springs. As beautiful as Dread and Terror was, I was happy to be done—even if it meant facing a gaggle of naked hippies. *gag*

Lucky for me, the trail to the hot springs tub was a spur off of the main trail and I didn’t have to face the real dread and terror.

Hot springs, again, was a lovely piece of trail. It felt like it climbed more than it did. I think partially because I had left the side of the river and was climbing up and away.

Exposure here was still significant, but didn’t pose nearly the danger that Dread and Terror did.

Deer Leap segment
Difficulty: Advanced
Gain: 2329
Loss: 3016
Length: 9.7 miles
Deer Leap broke me. I don’t know if it was the fact that I’d been battling a bad sore throat all week (what I’d like to think) or my anemic training (likely) or a combination of the two, but Deer Leap was pain and misery wrapped up into a wicked single track. Sometimes dry, sometimes wet, the trail seemed like it never dropped more than a 100 feet without climbing 75.

I was in my pain cave.

During Deer Leap I started looking seriously at my stats. I was averaging 5 mph, not my expected 7. I’d started an hour late. By this time I was supposed to have been at least 15 miles further than I was and there was no way I could reach my cut-off time of 4 to reach the top of Tioga. It was 3:30 pm. I had yet to reach the Marster’s trailhead for lunch (I should have hit it around 1 pm).

My body was also beginning to shut down. I had to walk several uphills that shouldn’t have caused me problems.

Additionally, my bike was also giving me trouble (again!!), ghost shifting and slipping on the drive train and getting stuck between the front gears and the frame. If I wasn’t careful, I’d break my new chain and have to walk the last several miles to the trailhead.

It was during Deer Leap that I decided that I’d have to call it.

When calling ahead to the BLM, they’d reported that a small section of Deer Leap was closed and that I’d need to get on the highway for a few miles to circumvent the closed area. Unfortunately I got off a mile or two too soon and found myself with a couple extra miles of highway before reaching the Marster’s Trailhead where I’d meet my shuttle. When it came time to get back on the trail for the last two miles, I opted out and coasted down to find that my shuttle. It was 3 hours later than we’d planned on meeting and we’d both just barely arrived. After a hasty lunch, we packed up and headed down the highway where I experienced my first case of runner’s diarrhea while biking. I think it was in large part to eating so much salt-heavy food without taking in enough water. I was just glad it didn’t happen on-trail!

All-in-all, it was an enjoyable ride despite the DNF. I’d given it a good try and I’d come to some stark realizations:

• I’m not in the shape I’d like to think I am if 33 miles of singletrack is going to give me this much trouble
• If I can’t break the average 5 mph barrier, I’ll never do real events like the Park City Point to Point or the Leadville 100.
• Getting sick right before a big ride is a bad idea
• Always, always, always, buy a topo before planning a big route like this. The assumption that I’d only gain a few thousand feet (not the reported 13,000) was a stark wake-up call and shook my confidence. (Full disclosure, I’m not entirely sure that map is accurate. My GPS reported me climbing only about 2,700 feet over the 33 miles. I think if I’d finished it, it would have only climbed to, maybe, 5000). Though my GPS could be wrong. It sure felt like more than 2700! Update: After enabling my GPS to to auto correct elevation data, the actual climb ended up being 5,419 ft over those miles. Seeing that makes me think that 13k over the entire route is a reasonable number.
• There were times I could have ridden the downhill faster than I did, but the constant threat of a sheer drop-off into a cold river discouraged any downhill speed advantages I hoped to gain.
• Despite the fact that I didn’t finish, I expended the same calories as I would have running a marathon. Not a bad effort when considering it in that light.
• The Umpqua River Trail will always be there. Next time I won’t get distracted with training for a half marathon and focus my efforts on just riding
• It’s easy to get dehydrated in a humid climate. I should have gone through at least 30 oz of water more than I did.
• Some chamois cream would have come in handy. I’ve never had chafing issues, so it’s never been something I’ve bothered with. Again, I’m chalking it up to the humidity.
• Bikepacking, rather than an ITT, is likely a better way to see the Umpqua. It’s so beautiful that I could have spent way more time taking photos and doing side trips than I did. A three-day stretch would have been just about right.

Final stats:

Overall
Time: 06:57:59
Distance: 33.84 mi
Elevation Gain: 2,792 ft 5,419 ft
Calories: 3,798 C
Avg Temperature: 52.5 °F

Timing
Time: 06:57:59
Moving Time: 05:28:35
Elapsed Time: 07:02:47
Avg Speed: 4.9 mph
Avg Moving Speed: 6.2 mph
Max Speed: 28.8 mph

Elevation
Elevation Gain:2,792 ft 5,419 ft
Elevation Loss: 5,128 ft 7,772 ft
Min Elevation: 1,957 ft
Max Elevation: 4,379 ft